Thursday, November 17, 2005

"I must be cruel, only to be kind..."

One day a young lad decided he would help contribute to a project aimed at bringing the whitewater world into a new era. He decided to go out and buy an expensive video camera and carry it around the southeast and California. This young lad began to slowly amass footage of the Jib Council's wisdom, hoping to make a video documenting The Jibber's rise above the other pussywillows of the world. In his pursuit of The Truth, the lad sifted day and night through fact and fiction, digging deeper and deeper, looking for the pearl that would set his message apart and forgo the contemporary standards. This young lad found a cache of ancient wisdom stored in The Archives of Northern Georgia, and went to The Keeper to request the use of said ancient footage. Yet, low and behold, the lad found that he had been deceived and his life's work had been for naught.

Lad: Great Keeper of the Archives, I beseech thee for the lost tapes of Jibberdom!
Keeper of the Archives: Your footage has been given away to The Great Knows.
Lad: What is this disheartening message you tell? Has the trust of Jibberdom been infiltrated by some surly leviathan?
Keeper: The Keeper has spoken! Now leave my presence for you have irritated my hemorrhoids!

And so, distraught, the lad returned to the secret jibencampment to relay the news that the Archives had been plundered by barbaric aliens. The Council held an immediate summit to discuss plans for retribution:

King Tubes: There is only one course of action we can take. WAR! We shall awake before day break and hunt these fools like the animals they are!
Captain Ralph: But sire, we know not the ways of these foreigners. We shall track them and learn their patterns, so we can creep upon them in the night and snuff them with exact execution!
Little Lando: What, should we suppose, are the intentions of this great Knows? Will he use the wisdom for good? Or evil?
Brother Broiler: I have reason to believe The Knows has intentions of making a virtual guide book of our very own local creeks. I say we seek the advice of The Lady Luck, Aquafienda, in the mystic courts of Mt. Sativa. She will guide us in our search for retribution.
Captain: How dare he! The Keeper has betrayed us in assisting such an evil and misguided exploitation!
King Tubes: Yes, Captain, this is indeed a sad day. And dear Brother, you have again showed me my own blinders. Aquafienda will know the intentions of The Great Knows.
Kriste O. Pherson: Has anyone seen my other poagie?
Captain: The brother is right. This matter is of more importance than any of us can comprehend while blinded with anger and confusion. We should seek the wisdom of our lady.
King Tubes: It is decided. We wake at daybreak and head for the mountains!

As we speak, the council seeks the elusive Aquafienda. What will be their course of action? Only time will tell, but meanwhile, I believe the school of hard knocks needs to add a course on good decision making.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Lurk Skywalker Lunching

here is a little snack pack for all you lunchables out there:

how will we go?
in rain and flood then snow?
maybe quakes and fire

is what god desires
to end this freakish show.
and who will outlast
time’s destructive path?
the rich? the poor?
the ones who know more
and had brains so big
that they chose to dig
a hole in which to hide?
these fat little rats
with translucent skin,
white beady eyes, and
spines of small size,
will crawl in the bowls
with worms fear of owls,
hating each second they’re in.
squirming and whining,
they wish they were dining,
in the feast halls of days long gone.
till one day desire,
consumes them like fire,
and they creep back to the top.
the sun hits their face

and they vaporize in place,
cause they lost their old tough skin.
but there, just before,
they become nothing more,
a fancy site they will see.
the earth in a place,
a time and different space,
hurling itself 'round the sun.
what will be there?
a tom, dick and hare?
or bugs with six legs
and snakes laying eggs?
i guess no one knows,
till times decompose
and then we'll have an answer.
but be sure that one ribbon like song,
will sew the worlds together.
hummmm life moveth on,
strike times shaking gong,
and please will you pass me that…

wednesday night is The Rodson's debut in the folk-like rock band that is SOUTH HEIGHTS
pictures of this momentus occasion to follow

Thursday, November 10, 2005

"I'm lovin It"

I love the internet... You must as well... Well you're here aren't you?

I was going to post some shi yesterday it would have been sweet cause I was pissed but then I went running.. Oh well maybe next time. Randy R ain't been writting so this place is commandeered for NOV. 10. I think he might have been put off by some fags on the internet who told him this wasn't worth reading.

I especially like clicking the next blog button... Sometimes you can read about politics, science, squash, swinging, and sometimes there are pictures of hot chics.

Occasionally I read about kayaking on forums upon the world wide web. It's usually pretty boring until someone starts some shit up. Today's highlites were:


and the surprise follow up:

Here's a real zinger:

also the forum on has been reaalll niice them peoples panties is all wadded up no matter how you slice it.

I like the way the internet has become a good information source for kayaking and how people also use it to boost their own fame and/or egos
some have been quite successful.
I like to use the internet to video scout. I haven't gotten out of my boat to look at a rapid since I got rid of dial up.

another entertaining read is when Rush Sturgen asks the reads of the caliproduct forum why everyone is all hating on his crew man. Why ya gotta be hating on YGP bro? The internet is sweet because you can post something that seems ok while at your desk and then once it is out there you realize you made yourself look like a pussy.
This is what a pussy looks like: (!)

see what I mean ( at least I can edit this later... I think)

on a side note sometime when you get a chance look at a blog called write this shit down I like that guy he seems unhappy.

How 'bout those politicians ehh?

daa da da da daaa....